DIVORCE MISTAKES DURING THE DIVORCE

  1.  Losing control of yourself, your temper, and your legal bill. Keep your emotions in check.

  2.  Hindering your case. Do whatever you can to help your cause and do not hinder your divorce lawyer. Pestering her with numerous phone calls each day with trivial questions will alienate the one person who is trying to help you. Save up several questions or items for discussion before calling. Talking to your attorney's paralegal may be just as helpful and cost you

less. Ask your attorney what you can do to help her.

  3.  Make appearances at your divorce attorney's office without an appointment.

  4. Expecting or demanding unrealistic things from the divorce. You will not get everything you want just like in the marriage.  It is best to make your demands reasonable. There are no winners in a divorce. The best you should expect is to be treated fairly but that may happen only if you insist on it with the help of your divorce lawyer.

  5.  Letting divorce lawyers or their paralegals gather and organize your paper work when you should be doing it.

  6.  Being afraid to rely on your own judgment.

  7.  Giving up control of the divorce to your divorce lawyer, friends or relatives. It's your divorce and you should be making the important decisions that affect you. Don't let friends and relatives steer you too much - use your own judgment and get through this your own way. However, confiding in and getting moral support from one or more close friends can help immensely.

  8.  Not listening and following your divorce attorney's advice. If your attorney's advice isn't good enough to follow, get a new attorney.

  9.  Staying with a divorce attorney that makes you unhappy. Hiring a different attorney can be the best decision you make.

10.  Failing to calculate the after-tax value of your house and other real estate as well your vehicles, household belongings, stocks, bonds, IRAs, retirement plans, and other financial assets. Get help as necessary. Divorce lawyers and Family Law Judges may not be concerned enough with tax consequences and advice from an accountant can be useful.

11. Dividing up property without a thorough inventory and accurate valuations. You should make an inventory list of marital assets including description, year purchased, purchase amount and present value:

Vehicles;

Personal property of significant value including sentimental value (jewelry,

guns, recreational toys, appliances, etc);

Real estate;

Investment accounts (stocks, mutual funds etc.);

Cash accounts (savings, checking, money market, certificates of deposit

and bonds;

Ownership interests of businesses;

Retirement accounts;

Life insurance policies;

Taxes owed or refunds due.

Also make a list of marital debts including description, year acquired, interest rate and present amount owed as of a certain date: mortgages and liens on real and personal property, credit cards, loans including student and personal ones.

12. Failing to be precise when negotiating child custody and visitation. Get specifics on the court record to insure which parent gets to do what and when and which parent is responsible for what.

13.  Letting stress or depression cause you to give up your routines. Regular exercise, good eating habits and resting will help get you through major challenges. Drink plenty of water, don't get dehydrated.

14.  Avoiding therapy or counseling when a little help of this type could go a long way. Using your divorce attorney as a therapist does not count and is not cost effective.

Disclaimer:  information on this website is presented as generalized suggestions, checklists and possibilities to consider when asking your divorce attorney specific questions about your particular circumstances and shall not be construed as legal advice.  No attorney-client relationships are formed from use of this website.